Saturday, January 12, 2013

The Zoo

Today we did birthday stuff for my little sister. It's not her birthday for a few more days, but myself and one of my brothers will be back in our respective towns taking college classes by then, so we did it today. We went to the Pittsburgh Zoo, which was cool in some ways and depressing in others, as many zoos are I think. Then we got home, and my brother and I spent 2 hours arguing over what would win in a fight between a polar bear and a silverback gorilla. Anybody care to chime in on that particular contest? (Neutral terrain, no place to escape to, both animals realize they have to fight.)


  1. That's . . . a dumb argument. Not because the question doesn't matter, but because the answer is obvious. The polar bear would win. It's much larger, and has claws. A VERY small female polar bear would be about 400 pounds (a large male, about 1500 pounds). A VERY large male gorilla would be about 400 pounds, so it would be exceedingly rare to find examples of the two species that are anywhere near the same size.

    The ONLY possible monkey wrench (pun intended) that anyone could conceivably throw into this is the gorilla's higher intelligence, but I don't believe they use their intelligence in the event of a fight. When the adrenaline kicks in, they fight in a certain way.

    This is not even a question.

  2. Exactly. Yet for some reason he insisted on believing that the gorilla would win. To me it didn't even seem like a contest, but he would not be swayed.

  3. He's obviously never been in a fight with someone twice his size before. I have. (Literally twice my size. At the time I weighed 135 lbs. According to the football team roster, he weighed 270.)

    Based on that experience, I can guarantee with 100% certainty the polar bear would win. Typically it would be about three times as big. I would go so far as to say that you can put all other factors in the gorilla's favor, so it can ambush the polar bear in the middle of a hot jungle, with the high ground, and the gorilla would still lose.

  4. I'm rooting for the polar bear.